May 2013
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suojure:
malijuanastyles:
i was sitting in the bathroom today when like 5 girls walked in and i stopped pooping right away cause i didn’t want them to hear me but then i thought why is taking a shit so bastardized today like why cant i poop in peace in the privacy of my own stall without caring if people listen to the flop flop plop plop sploosh sploosh like damn just sing along to the ploop...
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“Women are afraid of meeting a serial killer. Men are afraid of meeting someone...”
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When Strangers Click, a 2011 documentary about online dating.
It reminds me of that famous Margaret Atwood quote: “Men are afraid that women will laugh at them. Women are afraid that men will kill them.” It also reminds me of something written by one of the mods of Sex Worker Problems: “Misandry...
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kookyteen:
i want an episode of hannibal where will and hanni get really stoned and will’s like ” oh man lets go get some munchies” and hanni’s like yeah so they drive out to 7-11 and they meet back at the till like 10 minutes later and hannibal has a dead body and will has cheetos and hes like what
imagine a world where all living beings coexist with each other, like you go to the market and a bear is packing your groceries. You drive home and you see tulips playing soccer, that’s the world i wanna live in.
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“Men have called me a man-hater, a feminazi, frigid, a bitch… but in my mind it...”
– (via xenaamro)
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Watchcatswithbenefits:
An elderly woman whose home was destroyed by the Oklahoma tornado found her pet dog among the rubble during a live TV interview
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“Although most boys figure out how to bring themselves to orgasm by age thirteen,...”
– Dorian Solot, I Love Female Orgasm: An Extraordinary Orgasm Guide. (via thelostsunprincess)
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“Joan of Arc came back as a little girl in Japan, and her father told her to stop...”
– Iain S. Thomas, I Wrote This For You (via atramentum)
selfdoubtandsyphilis:
dankestrnemes:
do animals think in english or in the sounds they make
this is what yahoo paid $1.1 billion for
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Why Do Men Keep Putting Me in the Girlfriend-Zone?
bedhead-and-cigarettes:
postcardsfromspace:
literaryreference:
You know how it is, right, ladies? You know a guy for a while. You hang out with him. You do fun things with him—play video games, watch movies, go hiking, go to concerts. You invite him to your parties. You listen to his problems. You do all this because you think he wants to be your friend. But then, then comes the fateful...
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clumsyoctopus:
my ad for beauty products
girls putting makeup on like warpaint and kicking people in the face
old ladies wearing eyeshadow and getting flocked by hunks who carry them away and crown them queens of their own country
girls putting on makeup and then just sitting and eating doritos in front of the computer all day because fuck it that shits for you
ANYTHING IS BETTER THAN...
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